It was the winter of 1995. Life was happening to me big time. I had put my foot down and stood up for my rights as a worthy human being. I left my husband and he was bound to make me pay for it.
I had police officers delivering subpoenas to me several times a week. One day I got a call asking about my office space for rent ad.
“What are you talking about?” I asked. “No, my office is not for rent. I work here.”
I got an unlisted phone number. My soon-to-be ex called me to say hello on that number the next day. My key would not open the door to my business…he had changed the locks. And, when the locksmith came to let me in he told me that my estranged husband had threatened his life for letting me back in. The stepchildren I had so lovingly nurtured for 6 years sped by me on the sidewalk as if I were a total stranger. He reported me to the city supervisor for protecting my garden with an electric fence. He tried to get me fined for not having a door in one part of my now home-office. It went on and on. It was all I could do to complete the day’s activities and lock that door at night without falling apart in front of my clients.
About the only sanity I had in my life at the time was a monthly sacred dance circle. I lived for it. I remember having a nervous breakdown on the way back from my attorney’s office one-day. “God, what is it that you want from me? Tell me what to do! Talk to me. You talk to lots of other people…Talk to ME!” I begged God to take me home.
I lived for that dance circle and the beautiful uplifting music, a type I had never heard before–so positive. I was desperate. I knew that the instructor, Irene, was practicing for two new videos. I called and asked her if it would be OK for me to just hang out and dance with them as a stress reducing thing. I think she felt sorry for me and told me to come.
As practicing progressed, Irene began videotaping the sessions. On February 6th she asked me to be a part of the two videos.
“When will they be filmed?” I asked.
“February 14th” she said.
“Ugh.” I thought. Could I do something like that?
I accepted. The only problem was that I had not been taking their practices seriously. I was there dancing for me, because it helped me to connect with God. I had never been a part of any type of team or sport; I had never considered myself to be that coordinated. Also, with such short notice, she did not have an outfit for the video Dancing a Miracle for me, so she hurriedly ordered an extra set of leotards and “wings” as she called the multi-colored lavender scarf we were to drape around our shoulders when dancing.
February 14th came too quickly. We all assembled in the filming studio as the make up artist applied our make-up for that first video which was to be called Dancing a Miracle. My wings had not shown up.
“Could we do Native Spirit first?” I asked hopefully.
“No, we are set up for Dancing a Miracle. I’m so sorry.” Irene replied. She assigned me to making calls to San Francisco, Fed Ex, airports, and post offices in an attempt to track down my “wings”.
The team, minus me, assembled on the staging area. Irene assigned me to one of the video stations to give feedback. The first microphone was attached to Irene and a test run was completed.
The film crew jammed into the editing booth to run the film to analyze sound and shooting angles. Upon hearing crackles and muffles, they decided to change to a different microphone. The dance team sequestered around my post expressing their condolences that I was not able to be in this video. My miracle happened when they re-assembled on stage a second.
The room became very dense, warm and quiet. It felt like I was within a womb of energy which came down from the ceiling like a wave, pushing down into the floor. And then I heard a voice say to me, “Hmm. I like what you’re doing here.” There was a pause, followed by, “Your wings will be here.”
The energy shifted again and the density of the room was restored to normal. A peace like I have never felt came over me. I knew I would be in the video. I had released all doubt and just waited and watched as the events unfolded.
The team took the stage for the second trial run and completed the first song again. Again people packed into the editors booth to watch and listen and work out the bugs. The new microphone had not worked well either. Ah, there was one more microphone they could try. It was in another building. One of the crewmembers ran to get it as the team surrounded me again expressing how sorry they felt for me. I rebuffed their hugs saying confidently, “My wings will get here in time. Don’t worry.” They looked at me with sadness. I’m absolutely positive they were thinking I was in self-denial.
A third time the team assembled on the stage.
Just as the music started to play, Irene’s husband charged into the room with the Fed Ex package announcing loudly, “They’re here! They’re here! The Wings are here!”
We went on to complete the two videos with its four team members. The rest is history.
My miracle…that day, for the first time in my life I saw that day the possibility of a different way of being. It changed my life. I experienced the power that the New Thought movement has with it’s music and movement in the form of Spiritual Dance and how it can shift peoples belief systems within hours. I do not believe that any person on the film crew knew what was in store for them that day or how these two videos would shift their lives.
And, most importantly, God had finally talked to ME. Who could ask for a more perfect Valentine’s Day gift?