Help–Life Is Happening to Me

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By Dr. Denice Moffat

Life is happening to me. What do you suggest?

I’m not even going to make up a name or location for this person—sometimes I do that to protect people’s identities. Life is truly happening to this woman. How would you handle this?

Hi Denice, I will be needing you to scan for supplements, etc but am not ready due to finances and everything in my life being messed up. . .I thought I would just keep you posted on what is going on.  Four days after we moved, my husband took off.  He left without anything. . .the clothes on his back and a paycheck. I was concerned about suicide as he has been very depressed and his family has a history of suicide.  I eventually found him. . ..he went back to the state we were living previously to his old job that he hated, saying that was all he had (he has pushed everyone away. . ..families, friends, etc).  He said I was better off without him and had a chance to start a new life that he couldn’t screw up, etc, etc.  As if moving wasn’t stressful enough! I feel strongly that we are supposed to be together on a spiritual level.  Maybe this is to clear the old and change us in dramatic ways so we can come back together to serve a higher purpose? I can’t imagine trusting him again, but I guess I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. I have never experienced anything like this, and really want it to be over.  It sure seems like more lessons in faith, trust, discernment, and patience. I am sure sick of it. Any suggestions?

Answer: Wow. I don’t know about you all, but I’ve sure had times in my life where the characters were different and the plot was just as unique, but it sure generated the same amount of stress as this woman’s tale. I’ve heard many a unique story over the years in my practice. I guess, generally speaking, we all think that we are alone in the world and that our problems have never been experienced by anyone else. Why do we think that? I think it’s because people just don’t air their dirty laundry out for everyone to see. We often suffer in silence. It seems that people experiencing a life of Spirit tend to take on more traumas and dramas in their lives than most people.

The funny thing is that one day you wake up and decide that it is only our own attitude that can change to make a difference in our world. And we realize that these are not traumas and dramas, but special gifts we are experiencing that are molding our souls into the true unconditionally loving beings that we truly are. We realize that the people that are causing us the most angst are really the biggest angels in your lives. I believe these angels have come down directly from heaven with a soul contract to help further our life’s purpose. Of course we don’t see this perspective as we experience it.

We can’t live other people’s lives for them, and no matter what energy expenditure is given out to a particular situation, sometimes we can’t make things right.

Eating more raw foods, juicing and prayer helps somewhat in these situations. I try to focus on what I’m learning from the situation. What good is coming from it? Is Spirit pulling us in a different direction? Are we being pushed into something that we have been resisting as a life-shift to better use your gifts for the Universal good? Sometimes dramas/traumas in a person’s life are the Universe’s way of getting us to shift into a direction where we wouldn’t have dared to jump.

The Universe provides exactly what we need. And what we think about is what we create in physical form.  Know that, look for the good, and let God do the rest.

I’ve read, practiced and developed my own twist on many techniques to snap me back to the road of Enlightenment which are posted in the coaching corner of my website and in the Techniques section, but it’s good to be able to fall back on something immediately when you need it. My favorite focusing technique is listening to inspirational music, be it old hymns or New Thought artists. When I sing, I allow and feel my body reconnect with Spirit and trust that there is a bigger plan than what I am experiencing.

The one thing I have come to realize over my life is that I am not in control. God is. And if I say that I have faith, then I better just practice it. I do what I can within my human realm to rectify any challenges, then I put the rest in my little blue God Can—a little can I have on my desk where I put those items that I can’t do anything more about (but God can). I then take a deep breath, put on my Buddha smile and walk in my garden.

What is your back up plan for those out-of-control moments?

Here is one of the songs I love to envelop myself in to shift my thinking. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

What if? By Karen Taylor-Good from her CD “Song Guru”

You said goodbye and with a word, it seemed my whole world crashed down to earth.

I cursed your name and the night so black, when I guess all along

I should have thanked you for that.

‘Cause now I’m out from under, as I look around. . . I wonder. . .


What if everything that makes us sad, turns out to be not so bad?

Everything that seems so wrong, was what I needed all along?

And what if we don’t have a clue? What if we’re just not meant to?

What if everything in life’s a gift? What if?

Life’s a question, a tale untold. We find all the answers as it unfolds.

And I have learned from trials and tears, that Faith is my freedom,

And it’s stronger than fear. And what I’d been afraid of?

Maybe that’s the stuff dreams are made of.


What if everything that makes us sad, turns out to be not so bad?

Everything that seems so wrong, was what I needed all along?

And what if we don’t have a clue? What if we’re just not meant to?

What if everything in life’s a gift? What if?

There’s more to the picture than we can see. . .We’re part of a tapestry.

It’s a beautiful mystery.


What if everything that makes us sad, turns out to be not so bad?

Everything that seems so wrong, was what I needed all along?

What if things that made me cry, made me stronger by and by?

Everything they threw my way made me who I am today.

What if I’m just finding out, that Trust is what it’s all about?

What if everything in life’s a gift?  What if?

In the background:

Trust the voice inside you now. There’s so much we’ll never know.

Give up control and let it go. We’re not meant to see the future.

Faith and Trust are the solution. . .

What if?

© 2006 by Dr. Denice M. Moffat

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